Our 9 Favorite Feature Stories This Week: Deserters, Second Chances, And The End Of Obesity

This week for BuzzFeed News, Joel Oliphint discovers how one simple device could change our understanding of hunger and the way physicians treat obesity. Read that and these other great stories from BuzzFeed News and around the web.

1. The Invention That Could End Obesity — BuzzFeed News

Photograph by Erin Kirkland for BuzzFeed News

A Michigan surgeon invented an apparatus that he believes tricks the brain into thinking the stomach is full. His Full Sense Device could be a lifesaver for millions of obese Americans and raises questions about how hunger — our most basic human impulse — even works. Read it at BuzzFeed News.

2. A Boy Among Men — The Marshall Project/The Atlantic

Illustration by Edel Rodriguez

A devastating piece by Maurice Chammah on how the American prison system fails to stop — and may even facilitate — the rape of young men, despite the passage of the Prison Rape Elimination Act in 2003. “PREA has not been a complete failure, but it is also far from delivering on its promise.” Read it at The Marshall Project or The Atlantic.

3. How the Killing of a Trans Filipina Woman Ignited an International IncidentVice

Courtesy of Marc Sueselbeck for Vice

Jennifer Laude was engaged and in the happiest time of her life when she was brutally murdered last October. Meredith Talusan travels to the Philippines to discover how authorities are — or aren’t — planning to prosecute the US marine standing trial for her death. Read it at Vice.

4. Could Running for President Destroy Ben Carson’s Legacy? — BuzzFeed News

Carolyn Kaster / AP Photo

Long before Ben Carson was a champion to social conservatives and an anathema to liberals, he was a legendary neurosurgeon and an icon of black triumph. Joel Anderson asks: Will his turn to politics destroy his legacy? Read it at BuzzFeed News.

5. American DeserterNew York Magazine

Photograph by Christopher Anderson

Wil S. Hylton explores the fraught, divisive, and precarious lives of the few American military deserters remaining in Canada. “American deserters [are] in a grotesque bind: At a time when most Americans can agree that the decision to invade Iraq was disastrous, the only U.S. troops still fighting over the invasion are those who took a firm stand against it.” Read it at New York Magazine.

6. Will the “Female Viagra” Ever Get It Up? — BuzzFeed News

Alice Mongkongllite for BuzzFeed News.

Flibanserin, a drug that revs up women’s sex drives, has been battling for five years to get the FDA’s stamp of approval. Azeen Ghorayshi digs into the debate between feminists, who say flibanserin is a victory for women’s rights, and other scientists, who question whether the drug really works. Read it at BuzzFeed News.

7. How an Undocumented Immigrant from Mexico Became a Star at Goldman SachsBloomberg Business

Photograph by João Canziani for Bloomberg Businessweek

Max Abelson chronicles the career of Julissa Arce who, as an undocumented immigrant, went from selling food cart funnel cakes in Texas to eventually becoming a vice president at Goldman Sachs. “If there’s something valued more deeply at Goldman than separating the irrelevant from what matters or anticipating issues before they erupt, it might be the dogged pursuit of opportunity.”
Read it at Bloomberg Business.

8. MC Jin’s Second Chance — BuzzFeed News

Photograph by Jon Premosch for BuzzFeed News

Jean Ho profiles MC Jin, the first Chinese-American rapper to approach mainstream success, only to vanish from the scene as quickly as he arrived. Now, he’s attempting a comeback — but is anyone listening? Read it at BuzzFeed News.

9. Confessions of a Disordered Eater — BuzzFeed News

Illustration by Justine Zwiebel for BuzzFeed News

After a lifetime struggling with compulsive, secretive, and restrictive eating, Anita Badejo is still figuring out how to have a healthy relationship with food. “I’ve come to realize I eat the same way I hit my snooze button every morning: just a little bit more.” Read it and more great essays published for #BodyWeek at BuzzFeed.

Want to read more stories like this? Sign up for our Sunday features newsletter, and we’ll send you a curated list of great things to read every week!

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Read more: http://www.buzzfeed.com/anitabadejo/our-9-favorite-feature-stories-this-week-deserters-second-ch

That Feeling When Your Trail Camera Captures Something Creepy Is Not A Good One

Trail cameras are great tools for hunters and those who enjoy seeing everything nature has to offer. However, because these cameras are pretty much continuously running, they’re bound to catch some weird stuff every now and then. Sometimes, though, that weirdness turns to terror in mere seconds.

Take the following footage, for example. It was recorded on a trail camera in Deming, Washington, which is a little less than two hours outside of Seattle.

See anything creepy in the fog?

Okay, that admittedly goes by pretty quickly. Here’s a still with the glowing eyes circled to make things a little easier.

(source: Matthew)

Redditor TheBeef1991, who posted the video online, has no explanation for what those eyes belonged to. All I know is that I don’t want to find out.

Read more: http://www.viralnova.com/creepy-trail-camera/

The 11 Most Insane Laws About Food That Have Ever Been Enforced.

The law is tricky. There are many loop holes, outdated clauses, and bureaucratic issues. It’s not surprising that some silly things have slipped through the cracks and chaos from time to time. But these laws about food are just straight up bananas.

Whether or not they’re still enforced, the fact that these laws were real is terrifying. What else can be passed through governments? Yikes.

1.) Riverside, CA: It is illegal to carry your lunch down the street between 11:00 pm and 1:00 am.

2.) California: It is against the law to eat oranges in the bathtub.

3.) Boston, MA: You are restricted by law from eating peanuts in church.

4.) Kentucky: You can face a night in jail for putting your ice cream in your back pocket.

5.) Utah: It is illegal to not drink milk.

6.) Gainesville, GA: It is illegal to eat chicken with a fork, gotta use your hands.

7.) Singapore: Gum has been outlawed for over 20 years unless prescribed by a doctor.

8.) Marion, OH: It is punishable to eat a donut while walking backwards.

9.) Massachusetts: Mourners attending a wake may only consume up to three sandwiches.

10.) Alabama: Throwing salt on rail road tracks is punishable by death.

11.) Waterloo, NE: Barbers are legally forbidden from eating onions between the hours of 7:00 am and noon.

(H/T: Smosh.)

I’m just curious if eating a donut while moonwalking backwards would be allowed in Marion, OH… Someone please test this out and get back to us.

Read more: http://viralnova.com/weird-food-laws/

“Enough Is Enough”: Education Investor Denounces Meddling Journalists

A series of Chicago Sun-Times articles have raised questions about Chicago school board member Deborah Quazzo, a prominent education technology investor. Now, Quazzo is saying the newspaper crossed a line.

GSV Advisors founder and managing partner Deborah Quazzo speaks during at the New York Times Schools For Tomorrow Conference. Getty Images for The New York Times Neilson Barnard

In an email yesterday, a prominent education technology investor encouraged industry supporters to fight back against a Chicago Sun-Times investigation that was critical of her role as a member of the Chicago school board.

Investor Deborah Quazzo sent an email, with the all-caps subject line “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH”, asking her supporters to “stand united” against the attacks on her tenure, which she called “distractions.” The email included photos of the editor in chief and other top executives of the Sun-Times, along with their contact information.

The Sun-Times first published a story critical of Quazzo in December, reporting that during Quazzo’s tenure as a Chicago school board member, the district had tripled its spending on education-technology companies she had invested in. The five companies that Quazzo has an ownership stake in, the Sun-Times reported, collected $2.9 million from the school district since Quazzo joined the board in June of 2013.

Quazzo is a managing partner at the investment firm GSV Advisors, which invests primarily in education technology. She is also one of the co-hosts of the education industry’s most prominent and exclusive annual conference, the ASU/GSV Summit. Last year, Jeb Bush was the Summit’s keynote speaker.

The Sun-Times story led to calls for Quazzo’s resignation from the Chicago teachers’ union — which protested outsid her office with chants of “Quit, Quazzo, quit!” — as well as the Sun-Times‘ editorial board and mayoral candidates running against mayor Rahm Emanuel, who appointed Quazzo to the board. (Unlike in many U.S. cities, the Chicago school board is not elected.) Late last year, the Chicago inspector general said it had opened an investigation into Quazzo’s investments.

Quazzo said she had consistently recused herself from all school board votes concerning the companies she invests in.

After the Sun-Times reported yesterday that charter schools funded and approved by the school district had spent an additional $1.3 million on companies that Quazzo invested in, Quazzo appealed to supporters in the ed-tech and ed-reform communities. She wrote that she was “angry” about the investigation, which she called a coordinated effort to remove her from the board, and encouraged people to to ” take a minute and express your views to the leadership at the Chicago Sun-Times.”

“I am here to make a difference and no number of Sun-Times articles will deter me from that goal,” Quazzo wrote in the email. “I’m angry because nowhere in this back and forth has there been any focus on having an impact on students… I’m angry about many man-hours and dollars that have been expended by mission driven organizations serving our most vulnerable children at the behest of the Sun-Times and its investigation.”

In the wake of the controversy, Quazzo promised to give profits from her ed-tech investments back to Chicago education charities for the duration of her tenure and a year after she left the board. Critics have claimed that the promises are largely symbolic, since Quazzo stands to make a significant profit if the companies she invests in are eventually sold, which would likely be years down the line.

Quazzo told BuzzFeed News that she agreed to donate the profits from her investments because “It’s a totally great idea. I wish I’d thought of it before — it’s completely aligned with what I’m doing anyway,” she said. “I’m delighted to do it.”

Quazzo also disagreed with the Sun-Times‘ analysis, saying that if they had included a sixth company, Teachscape, in their calculation, the school district’s spending on companies she backs would have actually declined. Quazzo does not have an ownership stake in Teachscape, but owns stock options that she has not yet exercised. The Sun-Times also reported she had earlier argued Teachscape should be excluded from the calculation because she is not an owner.

Quazzo told BuzzFeed News that she targeted the Sun-Times in the letter, rather than the political groups that have seized on the story, because they were the “source of the misinformation. They’re turning me into a punching bag when the focus should be on the kids.”

“We stand by our stories and find her email puzzling,” said Sun-Times editor in chief Jim Kirk in a statement to BuzzFeed News. “Nothing in her email disputes a single fact in the stories. The newsworthiness of the facts our reporters have brought to light is obvious: A school board member is invested in businesses that do work for the school district and for taxpayer-suported charter schools authorized by the district. The response to the stories, from people who view those facts in different ways, has been strong, as is often the case with our coverage of local education and politics.”

correction

Deborah Quazzo is a member of the Chicago school board. In an earlier version of this story, a sub headline incorrectly described her as a former school board member.

Read more: http://www.buzzfeed.com/mollyhensleyclancy/enough-is-enough-education-investor-denounces-meddling-journ

9 Amazing Things Science Can Tell You About Parenthood

Don’t waste your time playing Mozart to your kids to make them cleverer — it doesn’t work.

1. We apply gender stereotypes to babies from literally the moment they’re born.

A study by researchers at California State University found that when shown a picture of a crying baby, children as young as 3 were more likely to say the baby was “sad” if told it was a girl and “angry” if told it was a boy, because of the stereotypes surrounding those genders.

It was a small study, but its findings have been repeated in other contexts and at other ages. We really do seem to apply “girlish” and “boyish” stereotypes even to babies far too young to have any sort of girlish or boyish behaviours.

2. Small children don’t know you are a person with a mind of your own.

If you’ve got a small child, you may have noticed that it spends a lot of time pulling your hair, or biting you. This isn’t because it hates you and wants to cause you pain: It’s because, before a certain age, it simply doesn’t occur to the child that you have a mind which can feel pain.

A developmentally normal child of 5 is a highly gifted mind-reader — as are most of us. We are able to guess, with remarkable accuracy, what the person we’re speaking to is thinking, what they’re aware of, what they think you think they’re thinking. But at the age of 3, most children can’t do any of this stuff.

There’s an experiment in which children are given the following scenario: Someone puts a marble in a box, and then leaves the room, and someone else moves the marble from the box into another one. The children are asked where the owner of the marble will look when they come back into the room. Up until they are about four, most children will say the second box, because they know the marble is there. They can’t think themselves into the mind of someone else who has access to different information.

Earlier in life, children are even worse at this
: For instance, up until between 12 and 18 months, if you point at something, they’ll look at your finger, not the thing you’re pointing at. And if you perform an action — say, trying to hang a loop on a hook — but fail at it, children will only work out to repeat the thing you were trying to do at about the age of 18 months. To do so would mean realising that the big creatures that give them milk and wipe their bottoms have goals and needs of their own, and that is quite a sophisticated idea.

3. Children have to learn how to lie — and for a while they’re hilariously bad at it.

Sure, by the time you’re a teenager you’ve really mastered the lying-to-your-parents thing. I’ll be home by midnight; no, I haven’t been smoking; what do you mean, running a major arms-smuggling and prostitution racket from your garage? But younger children simply do not have the skills.

In an experiment in which children were left in a room with a toy but told not to look at it until the experimenter returns, of course most of them did look. But when challenged, most 2- and 3-year-olds immediately confessed their terrible crime; the older they were, the more likely they were to lie about it.

What’s brilliant is that they aren’t necessarily very good at it. As well as being asked whether they looked, some children were asked what they thought the toy would be. Despite having just claimed not to have looked, younger children who lied would blurt out what they knew the toy was (“Barney!”). But slightly older children tried to be less obvious. One 5-year-old said: “I didn’t peek at it. I touched it and it felt purple. So, I think it is Barney.” By the age of 7, most are accomplished liars.

4. Babies are super racist.

No one is born racist, goes the saying. And it’s true, just about. But by three months old, babies prefer to look at faces of the race with which they are most familiar. However, it showed that children brought up in a multi-ethnic environment showed no preference for one ethnicity over another. Which is hopeful news for those of us with small children in large, multi-ethnic cities.

5. You’re OK to drink coffee when pregnant. And wine, in moderation.

When Emily Oster, an economist, got pregnant, she found that the advice on what to do and not do was unhelpful. As an economist, she expected discussion of evidence and risk: instead, she found unexplained commands, such as “don’t eat cured meats” and “don’t drink coffee”. So she looked at the statistical evidence behind the claims and wrote up her findings in a book, Expecting Better: Why the Conventional Pregnancy Wisdom is Wrong — and What You Really Need to Know.

She found that women who drink coffee during pregnancy are more likely to have miscarriages. And that sounds like you shouldn’t drink coffee, right? But it’s more complicated than that. Looking at the evidence, Oster found that it’s more likely to be the other way around: Women who are more likely to have miscarriages tend to drink more coffee. That may sound bizarre, but it makes sense. Some women suffer nausea during pregnancy, which puts them off coffee — but nausea is a sign of a healthy pregnancy. Also, older women — who tend to be at greater risk of miscarriage — tend to drink more coffee. The coffee/miscarriage link seems to be correlation, rather than causation, although one study suggested that if you drink large amounts of coffee and don’t reduce your intake at all there may be some increased risk.

Similarly, the risk of moderate wine drinking (“Drink like a European adult, not like a fraternity brother,” says Oster) is less than you might think.

She also found, by the way, that the injunction to avoid certain meats (because of the risk of listeria infection, which can cause miscarriage) is less useful than it might be. “My best guess was that avoiding sliced ham would lower my risk of listeria from 1 in 8,333 to 1 in 8,255,” she said.

6. Playing Mozart to your baby (or your bump) will not make it brainier.

In 1993, a small study found that listening to classical music for 10 minutes raised the IQ of college students by eight or nine points. This led to a craze in which parents played their children, babies, or even foetuses classical music, in the hope of giving them a better chance in life. The US state of Georgia even started handing out CDs of Mozart to new mothers.

But it’s nonsense. In 1999, the psychologist Chris Chabris carried out a meta-analysis of all the research into the so-called Mozart effect, and found that there was no such thing. The original study had been a fluke. “The results do not show any real change in IQ or reasoning ability,” said Chabris. “There’s a very small enhancement in learning a specific task, such as visualizing the result of folding and cutting paper, but even that is not statistically significant.

“There’s nothing wrong with having young people listen to classical music, but it’s not going to make them smarter.”

It’s not a total wash for “making noises to your bump” enthusiasts, though: There is some evidence that voices and songs that babies hear in the womb are more likely to soothe them when they’re out in the world.

7. Foetuses can taste the food you eat in pregnancy.

Research suggests that babies will be more likely to enjoy different foods if their mother ate them during pregnancy — apparently because the food flavours the amniotic fluid. (Since the foetuses are constantly peeing into the amniotic fluid, this does make one wonder if babies would also enjoy drinking pee, but this experiment has not yet been done.)

Linda Geddes, the New Scientist reporter and author of Bumpology, reports on a study from 2001 in which “the infants of mothers who drank 300 millilitres of carrot juice four times a week for three weeks during the last trimester of pregnancy, or during the first two months of breastfeeding, showed a greater enjoyment of cereals prepared with carrot juice once they were weaned”. Later studies have found similar results.

8. If left to their own devices, children will invent their own language.

Children are extraordinary language-learning machines. You don’t really have to teach them anything — they’ll pick it up from listening to your speech. (Western parents constantly feel they have to explain the language to their children. But, as Steven Pinker notes in The Language Instinct, lots of other cultures simply don’t talk to children until they’re capable of talking back, and they pick up their local language just fine.) But where it gets really interesting is if the adults they’re around don’t speak a language the children can use.

During the slave trade, groups of slaves and labourers were brought from all over the world. The different groups didn’t speak each others’ languages, but cobbled together a sort of crude patchwork, known as a pidgin. “Pidgins are choppy strings of words borrowed from the language of the colonisers or the plantation owners, highly variable in order and with little in the way of grammar,” writes Pinker. But as the children of pidgin-speakers grew up — especially if isolated from their parents, perhaps looked after by a pidgin-speaking worker — they often gave those pidgins highly complex grammar, creating a “brand-new, richly expressive language” known as a Creole.

Another example, away from the horror of the slave trade, is in deaf communities. Sign languages such as British Sign Language and American Sign Language were not, as often thought, created by well-meaning educators, but grown naturally among communities of deaf people. And in 1979 in Nicaragua, the government created the first schools for the deaf. The teachers focused on lip-reading and speech, and it didn’t work — but in the playground the children created their own system, which is now called the Lenguaje de Signos Nicaragüense. It has no relation to Spanish, and BSL and ASL have no relation to English: Pinker says that ASL has grammatical rules more reminiscent of Navajo and Bantu.

9. You aren’t a product of your upbringing.

Nature or nurture? Psychologists use the terms “genes” and “environment”. Further, they divide “environment” up into “shared environment” and “unique environment”. Shared environment is our home upbringing, school, neighbourhood, and all the things we share with our siblings. The other half is what is confusingly called the “unique environment”, but it essentially means “random other stuff” — the unquantifiable things that only happen to you. So “shared environment” includes all the stuff that you mean by “upbringing”.

When it comes to things like intelligence and personality, Steven Pinker, in his book The Blank Slate, says that twin studies have shown that the effects of shared upbringing “are small (less than 10 percent of the variance), often not statistically significant, often not replicated in other studies, and often a big fat zero… [A]ll things being equal, children turn out pretty much the same way whether their mothers work or stay home, whether they are placed in daycare or not, whether they have siblings or are only children [and] whether they have two parents of the same sex or one of each.”

Not that that means upbringing isn’t important. It’s hugely important — but in a different way. As Judith Rich Harris, author of The Nurture Assumption, points out, you may not be able to determine how intelligent or hard-working your child is, but you can easily make them miserable, or give them unhappy memories of childhood. Just don’t go into parenthood thinking you can mould perfect little children. You can’t.

Read more: http://www.buzzfeed.com/tomchivers/babies-are-super-racist

This Disorder Makes You Addicted To What? That Just Doesn’t Sound Right…

Münchausen syndrome is a psychiatric factitious disorder where the affected person fakes being ill. Often times, the faux symptoms are concocted to gain attention or fulfill the wish to be taken care of. The people listed below are the extreme, but even mild cases of the syndrome involve a lot more than running a thermometer under hot water to feign a fever. People will literally attempt to hospitalize themselves. It’s hard to wrap your mind around.

Take a look at just how complex the stories those suffering from Münchausen syndrome are able to come up with:

1. “Nails”

After complaining of neck pain that stemmed from an automobile accident, a 38-year-old woman was given a CT scan. Everything appeared to be fine until doctors noticed that the patient had nails near her spine–nails that she had put there herself.

2. “Funds”

A Colorado woman raised over $60,000 that was to go towards her treatment for the cancer that she didn’t actually have. No, there was no misdiagnoses here–she had completely made up the story to garner the attention and affection of her friends and family.

3.”44 lbs”

A man who was diagnosed with celiac disease after claiming to have lost 44 lbs in seven months. When his health did not improve after changing his diet so as not to upset the small intestine that celiac disease affects, doctors were perplexed. It was thought that he possibly had an immunodeficiency, until it was discovered that he was abusing drugs with the intention of obtaining the previously mentioned symptoms.

4. “Bacteria in the Bloodstream”

When a woman was admitted to Baylor University Hospital with bacteria in her bloodstream, the doctors performed many tests to see what they were dealing with, as it can lead to several serious infections. After the tests revealed that nothing was wrong, the staff grew suspicious–especially after discovering that she too worked in the medical field. While searching the patient’s room, they found a Petri dish and a syringe that she may have been planning to use to inject bacteria into her veins.

5. “The Wanderer”

A man in his early twenties made stops at hospitals all over New Mexico complaining of chest pain. After doctors discovered that nothing was wrong, he made trips to hospitals in other states and was eventually sent to a psychiatrist. Even so, he turned up in Ohio with a new story of a fictitious heart transplant he underwent in Germany. It took some time, but one of the doctors in Ohio finally realized that they had been seeing this patient for years and that they had been using numerous false names and birth dates to get unneeded treatments.

6. “Ms. J”

“Ms. J” is a young woman who really does have diabetes, but would purposely deprive herself of the proper amount of insulin while her husband was away so she could receive attention. By doing this, she was putting herself in danger of acute kidney failure and swelling of the brain.

7. Wendy Scott

Wendy Scott was able to overcome one of the most severe cases of Münchausen syndrome to be documented, but before her recovery, Scott had been a patient at over 600 hospitals and over 40 needless operations. Few suffering from Münchausen syndrome go public with their story, but Scott was very open with people and even reached out to those who also wanted to recover from the syndrome.

8. “Multiple Heart Attacks”

A 67-year-old man who claimed to have had two previous heart attacks arrived at a hospital with symptoms that would suggest he was undergoing his third. After being treated, he was released and no one ever heard from him again… until four months later, when he showed up complaining of the same symptoms… and the day after that when he did it again.

9. “Finger Pricker”

A Utah man claimed to have been dealing with nausea, pain in his right side, and blood in his urine when he arrived at University of Utah Medical Center. Because he said he was allergic to intravenous contrast dye, there was only so much the staff could do to see what was going on with his body. Lupus was briefly considered as the cause of his symptoms, but a physical examination revealed pin pricks on his fingers that tipped doctors off to the possibility that he was drawing blood from his digits to place in his urine. This was confirmed when a former doctor of his called to say that the patient had a history of fabricating symptoms.

10. “The Note”

In Texas, a woman arrived at Baylor University Hospital to receive chemotherapy. When the woman, who gave herself scars and shaved her head to make it look as if she’s received treatment before, was asked to provide medical records that proved she had cancer, she produced a forged note that was riddled with spelling errors and by no means resembled something someone working in the medical field would write.

(via Listverse)

It’s hard to understand anyone with this condition… but it blows me away that there are people everywhere who are hurting themselves for attention. It’s common for people to have cries for help, but this? It’s just insane. 

Click below to share this strange disorder. I hardly believe it really exists.

Read more: http://viralnova.com/extreme-munchausen-syndrome/

These Kids Aren’t Afraid To Dream Big, No Matter How Ridiculous Their Goals Are

It’s pretty much a guaranteed rite of passage as a kid that sooner or later, you’ll be asked by everyone you know what you want to be when you grow up. Well into my adult life, I still try to dodge the question, because in my eyes, I’m still a kid at heart.

But when it comes to dreams, discovering them at a young age can prove beneficial in turning the perhaps far-fetched goals into actual realities. I was always told that if you can dream it, you can do it. Let’s all repeat that mantra while we read these childhood dreams (and laugh hysterically)…

1. I wish he would have elaborated: hard shell or soft shell?

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2. Some dreams require more effort than others.

3. She has big dreams…of learning to multitask.

4. It’s the little things in life.

5. Warren just got real.

6. I still haven’t done this and I’m in my mid-20s.

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7. You can never have too much pizza.

8. I feel like there should be a protein in there, Alina.

9. Isn’t he the evil one from the third movie? At least be the good guy!

10. He dreams big.

11. Dollar dollar bills (and quarters), y’all.

12. I can see how this picture could be misleading.

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13. Before kicking butt in the real world, this kid wants to go for a test run in the world of video games.

14. From man to man’s best friend.

15. You and me both, kid.

16. I hear you — you get unlimited fries, right?

17. This kid’s so accomplished, he can already read with his eyes closed.

18. I totally can’t wait to accomplish that major milestone of turning 29…and cutting my own food.

19. Someone’s watched a few too many episodes of “Game of Thrones.”

20. I’m not sure these were quite the dreams Dr. King had in mind.

21. They do have good nachos…

22. This kid clearly has his priorities in order.

These kids are making me look bad. I really need to buckle down and get my life in order.

Read more: http://www.viralnova.com/dream-big/

10 Hilarious Fails That Prove Animals And Exercise Balls Just Don’t Mix

When used correctly, exercise balls can be a huge part of someone’s healthy routine.

In my experience, though, they mostly just roll around the house getting in the way or sit in a corner collecting dust. I should have expected it because animals make everything way better, but it turns out if you give a dog an exercise ball, it gets pretty hilarious. It’s not just dogs, either. These 10 animals, big and small, will make you feel way better about your floundering exercise routine.

1. This goat could have been a top contender for a circus act if he’d have been able to get his act together.

2. Oh, no! Piggie was so happy, and then…

3. So graceful, even in her complete defeat.

Youtube / Justin Ludwigson

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Youtube / Brian Drowns

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8. I guess ramming it over and over again is sort of

Youtube / Shannon Theall